Secretary: Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Institute of Mental Health (TO LISTEN!)

Transcript:

Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Institute of Mental Health ...

... If it's obsessive or compulsive Press repeatedly until the spasm of the 1 key.

If you have multiple personalities, press alternate keys 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

If you are paranoid, we inform you that we already know who you are, what to do in life and what wants from us, so stay in line, until we trace his call.

If you suffer from hallucinations, press the 7 key, the big pink phone that she and only she can see to the right.

If you are schizophrenic, politely ask them to his imaginary friend for her to press the 8 key.

If you suffer from depression does not matter which button to press, so there's nothing to do, his is a hopeless case and has no cure.

If you have amnesia, press the buttons in rapid sequence 2, 5, 9, 7, 5, 4, 1, 6, 3, 9, 2, 9, 7, 5, 1, 6, 3, 5, and repeat high item in the order that follows his name, surname, telephone number, home phone, e-mail address, account number, ATM code, date of birth, place of birth, marital status and maiden name of his Grandmother.

If you suffer from indecision, leaving the message before, during and after suffering from amnesia Bip.Se temporary short-term, press 0.

If you suffer from temporary amnesia of short duration, press 0.

If you suffer from temporary amnesia of short duration, press 0.

If you suffer from temporary amnesia of short duration, press 0.

If you suffer from obsessive greed to inform you that this call will cost about 500 Euros per minute.

If you suffer from low self-esteem, remains on hold, all our operators are currently busy responding to people much more important to her.

If it's one of those Italians who voted for Berlusconi in the last election, hang up, here we treat the insane, not assholes.

Thank you and resent

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